• I love Coco Wang’s China 5.12 Earthquake Strips. Emotionally moving and wonderfully done. (Click on the comic to enlarge and view full size to read). I cried lots (but I also laughed,too).

• Beck posted a lovely memorial tribute to Tasha Tudor

• I believe that Davka Deer Girl and Hobo Stripper are 2 of my most favorite blogs ever ever ever.

• Snatched from Summer on Twitter

Friends don’t let friends Twitter Drunk.

I keep drunk Twittering to a minimum. If you’d like to follow me as I tackle endless piles of laundry and other boring things,you may.

• It’s really too bad my little wedding/handfasting budget is $29.99. Buzzbee the Robot Bee Groom and Buzz Bride wedding cake topper would be perfect sitting on top of our wedding cake
• The lesson here: Don’t throw things at Josh Homme.Well, don’t throw things at anyone when they’re on stage.That’s just rude. If you want to get his attention, a tit flash would probably work. If you don’t have tits, just enjoy the show,duh.

I dreamed of Walmart. It’s been nearly 7 years since I’ve even stepped foot in a Walmart, yet in the dream I knew the layout of the store like the back of my hand. I navigated past islands of clothing and aisles of housewares and made my way to the bins with fabric remnants. I leaned over and inhaled the stacks of material with plaids and sunflowers. They smelled of stale cigarette smoke and even staler cheap perfume, even though they were brand new. This detail is thanks to a box of fabric scored in real life from a woman at a yard sale who informed me that “All those fabric bits, they came from Wal-Mart. I just ain’t never gotten around to using them at all. I don’t do much sewing anymore.” She was a sweetheart but the fabric smelled and I had to wash the entire box before it was put away,safe and sound with the rest of my fabric stash.

Standing among bolts of fabric was the boy I saw of the news, abandoned in the fabric department of a Wal-mart. I cannot get his face out of my head. His scared hungry eyes staring at the camera, wondering where Mommy went to.

When I watch the news, I involve everyone within earshot. Bush’s latest dumbass move, endless tragedy in Africa, the wrath of Mother Nature, Hugo Chavez’s instability,found severed feet,salmonella outbreaks,breached levees….I provide running commentary so everyone is in the know,even if they don’t want to be.

“Oh,my god…look at that poor little guy! He was abandoned at a Walmart,with a note from his mother saying she couldn’t take care of him.Honey,can we………..”

I was cut-off  mid-sentence and got my reply before I even asked,”NO, we’re not adopting him.”

“But…he’s from Guatemala.”, I offered as a reason. It seemed like a perfectly logical reasoning all on it’s own.

“Don’t we have enough kids from Central America already?”

Well, no. Not really. Those 2 we have are already adults and moving on with their lives. Besides, Little Martin on the News is only 2. Finally I’d have someone to converse with in Spanish who speaks the language just as well (poorly) as I do. I’m not exaggerating. Four years of high school Spanish,living with a fluent Spanish speaker and kids with Spanish as their native tongue have done nothing for me. They laugh at me and call me a gringa. Affectionately, of course.

It goes deeper than language,this desire to take into my home a child abandoned in a Wal-mart. It comes from the feeling that I know he was left out of love and that it was the hardest decision that woman had to make. I’ve seen hard times in my life. I’ve lived through hungry times, times where I gave what little food I had to the kids and went hungry myself. When you weigh 89 pounds so that you’re kids don’t go to bed hungry, you start to think of options to get yourself out of hell and make sure your kids have a better life than what you’re giving them.

Hard times have taught me many things. Resourcefulness,resiliency,strength,determination. Most of all, they’ve taught me to never forget where I’ve been and given me the ability to walk in other people’s shoes easily and without judgment. Some may call her crazy ,but if you can imagine being left alone to care for a child when you have no skills,resources and aptitude of the native tongue and probably do not have legal immigrant status, choices probably seemed pretty limited.

She didn’t leave the kid in the Wal-mart parking lot, where bad things tend to happen or sell him like a baby tiger cub . She left him in the fabric department, where the likelihood of a maternal being finding him was the greatest.I can’t believe it was a completely motherless act. It was an abandonment bred from abandoned hope.

Then again, I’m a totally altruistic fool.

If this story were to have an ending I scripted, Martin’s mother would be found.A  generous and kind individual would take them both in, help her attain legal status and the practical skills and education she needs to be self-reliant and provide for herself and Martin. Martin would grow up and achieve great success. He’ll buy his Mama a house .His spare time and money will be spent building schools and health clinics in Guatemala, as well as helping provide assistance for immigrants and their families in the US.

Alternate ending I can live with: The foster family he’s placed with embraces him and his culture as their own and eventually adopt him. When he grows up,he’s not angry at his mother for abandoning him. He’s thankful she helped him find opportunity and strives to help other’s find the same.

End of story.

Debi and Heather are bad influences. They urge me to do things I shouldn’t do. They’re those kids you hang out with in junior high - the ones always getting you to do stupid things like set fire to the desk in math class or add something vile to Ms Brown’s coffee when her back was turned.

Wait…that was high school.Nevermind.

Junior high shenanigans were probably sillier and now the things I do that I shouldn’t involve finding ways to swallow up already my limited time and giving me things that help me avoid doing dishes.

After stating that Southern fiction is probably my favorite genre, Debi insisted that I must sign up for The Southern Reading Challenge . Must. She forced me,I tell you! There was much coercion. I was forced to surrender and add my name to the Mr Linky .

Book list to come.

Then Heather…evil Heather…pointed me in the direction of The Summer of Socks knitalong . I do love knitting socks,you know. Well, I think everyone knows that. Heather promised there would be cookies or at least dpns. I’m sure these are empty promises but there are socks involved,so I’m in.

She also suggested I need to spend more time on my Ravelry account . I do agree with this. She’s right. No pushing needed there.

It’s all good,though. Actually, this will ensure I have plenty to keep me occupied at the playground and wherever else life takes me this summer. A good Southern read in the hot sun and small,compact socks instead of a mountainous pile of wool and/or other fiber to knit.

Now I need to find people who want something other than black socks on their feet. I’m a little bored w/ black socks,honestly!
——————————————————————————–
Some Twelve Word Reviews

The Torture Playlist: Music used in American military prisons during interrogations,as breakdown tactics and to drown out screams - Metallica says they’re honored to contribute to “war against terror”.I’m disgusted.
(Rage Against the Machine- not honored. Sent letter to State Department to say so. This is why I love Rage Against the Machine.Metallica - not so much)

The Rainbow Fish (revisited a thousand times over)- Capitalist fish hoardes sparklies. Gets lonely. Spreads wealth evenly. Communist conversion complete.

Yesterday schools here were closed due to an incident in a bathroom with an explosive and bomb threats. A fellow homeschool mom commented to me,”Boy, sure am glad we home school.”

Well, I have the best of both worlds,I guess - I have kids who attend public school and home school. Even though this incident occurred in the junior high, I had heard last night that all students and any adults entering the school would be searched, even elementary and high school. It looked like we weren’t going to avoid the drama.

This morning I walked Maia to school, as usual. As we approached the school, we saw extra security positioned at the entrances of roads leading to the school, in addition to our friendly and familiar crossing guard who greets us every morning with,”Good morning” and “Have a good day,sweetheart”,as he stops traffic and lets us cross. Getting closer to the school, there was obvious police presence. Maia, who is usually skipping way ahead of me, clutched to my arm, obviously alarmed.

Instead of jaunting in the usual door and heading straight to her classroom, we had to go to a specified checkpoint. Her backpack was searched,revealing just her gym sneakers,a library book and her homework folder. Children were being let off the school buses ,one bus at a time and fed through the checkpoints,all backpacks carefully searched.

As we entered the school, a third grader turned to me and said,”Well, that was scary”, with a nervous little laugh.

Indeed. My own first grader was aware of the reason school was closed yesterday.She wasn’t the least bit afraid to return to her school today but the extra precautions made her more nervous and afraid instead of reassuring her.

I’m reminded by my husband who has a background in law enforcement that these precautions are necessary and it’s better to be safe than sorry. A part of me understands. Most of me doesn’t,especially if this procedure will become a part of our daily routine. Since it was announced yesterday that all students would be searched and security measures would be put in place, everyone was aware that it was going to happen, including the student who started the whole hullabaloo in the first place. I doubt he/she would decide to carry on with additional threats. Most likely, this student passed through the checkpoint, had their backpack searched and passed through with a smirk on his or her face, pretty pleased that his or her actions created such a stir and inspired fear in fellow students and even little first graders who just wanted to skip to school in oblivion.

I have a few complaints to vent into the world

Five News Flashes For Today

1. The UPS Man is NOT on my list of favorite men right now. Still no coffeemaker.

2.We’re not headed into a recession. Bush said so. Economists disagree but that doesn’t really matter. We have our President’s word on the subject.
(you know, the same Prez who lied to us all over 900 times in a 2 year period. So very trustworthy!)

3.If you mention out loud that you’re thinking of having someone autograph your ass so you can have it permanently tattooed there, the man in your life is sure to try to assert his Alpha Male status and act all territorial.

4. I would never have someone’s name tattooed on my ass but I do like the reaction it gets when I mention doing such a thing

5. My washing machine is frozen ,which means Mount Washmore is ascending higher and higher.

——————————————————————————–
My daily morning cocktail the past few morning has been prenatal vitamins (because of the mega doses of vitamins and not the prenatal part,obviously) chased down with a soy protein shake. The protein shake is rather gross but I can get it down as long as I don’t smell it. It smells like baby formula and we all know how I feel about that. I was rummaging in the cupboard yesterday for something to make it a little more appetizing. My choices were Godiva liquer or Bailey’s. Neither really seemed the right choice so I just chugged through it.

I have little appetite the past several weeks. I’m a firm believer in how you treat your body being a huge part of mental health and realize that the lack of nutrients going into my body on top of the hormonal surges are not helping me at all so hence the new Morning Cocktail.

I do feel better.

There’s also something to be said about the assertion by mental health professionals that you can tell the state of a person’s mental health by looking at their house. My house is just as cluttered and illogical as my mind at the moment. My goal today is to kick some as on the house and try to mirror it in state of mind.

Besides, some man I live with has begun complaining that I’ve falling from my Domestic Goddess status. Pfft on him.

Last week I mentioned to hubby that I was going to buy the Serenity/Firefly comics. I honestly did not think I’d meet resistance but he groused about how I shouldn’t be spending money on that,blah blah blah.

I found it odd considering that nothing strikes fear into the heart of this man more than tossing out the threat of,“I know where you keep your comic book collection and I have an ebay account”. I’m sure he’s just trying to prove a point since I bitch a lot about his irresponsible and unnecessary spending.

This morning before he left for work, I felt like a tiny bit of a child asking for change for the gumball machines when I asked,”So,if I clean the kitchen completely spotless today, can I order the Firefly comics?”

I may have even added, “Pretty please?”.

I got a “We’ll see”.

Sadly, this is how I’m going to motivate myself to get the kitchen done today.As much as I like the Comic Book Reward System, I think the The Blow Job Reward System will save us more money. Hmmm.

My brain hasn’t caught up to reality yet. Yesterday I walked into my favorite little thrift shop and headed straight for the baby section. I had picked up 2 pairs of handmade booties,a sweater and a flannel blanket before I realized I wasn’t going to need them anymore.

I’m a little slow sometimes.

It’s weird how you condition yourself to prepare for something and then when the plans change, you still can’t get out of that mode. I’m like the bride who canceled the wedding but still can’t stop looking for wedding dresses.

The strange thing about this is that the whole reason I went into the thrift shop was to find some new pants.I’ve lost 9 pounds since the miscarriage and all my pants fall down. I hadn’t even gained any weight at all yet with the pregnancy so this is all weight lost due to me having no appetite yet.

I have nothing to do at this point in the entry but *sigh* and move along to other things.

Random things like:
1. Batman Begins -
It’s slightly annoying to watch any movie based on a comic book with someone who’s a comic book geek (i.e. my hubby). Ok, so I am a little bit,too but I can forgive and excuse creative liberties taken in movies. On a related note, Maia developed a crush on Batman when she was about 3 (she’s now 7). I think she’s got the right idea.

2. Zombies - When I made the blog for my shop, I decided I wanted to do my own Treasuries - groupings of favorite items of mine on Etsy. Since zombies seems to be the thing around here lately, I made a Treasury of Zombies on the shop blog.

I should have included the necklace I got for Lilly for Christmas that says “Zombies are the new Bunnies”. She wears it all the time

3.Super Tuesday - I have weird kids. At least 2 of them were totally stoked that it’s Super Tuesday

4. Papermaking- on today’s papermaking agenda - pink,blue,mauve and purple. I love it when I get custom orders and they’re all roughly in the same color family. It makes my life so much easier. It always messes with my flow when I’ll have orders for yellows,greens,and blues…and then an order of pink thrown into the mix.

5.House Purging- I bagged up 2 huge garbage bags of stufffed animals and toys.Now if only I could get someone to take them off my hands.

6.Pre-teen Musical Tastes - somewhere out there, there has to be music that my pre-teen twins will love to pieces that I can also tolerate.If I have to hear anything Hannah Montana/Miley Cyrus related one more time, my head is going to explode. The same goes for The Jonas Brothers,Ashley Tisdale,The Naked Brothers Band….must I go on? Dylan is equally frustrated and has considered locking his sisters in his room while he blasts …well, anything but that crap. *bangs head against wall*

7.My Grandmother- The doctor has made an official recommendation that she be placed in a nursing home. While this kills me (that I can’t take care of her instead), I know this is the right choice,especially for her safety.My greatest fear is that she’s going to get it into her head to go somewhere on her own and just walk out of her apartment and get lost. She gets “lost” going to the bathroom, I think a trip to the grocery store unattended would be catastrophic.Not to mention that she has been falling a lot recently and by the time help arrives, she can’t remember where she fell,what she hurt or sometimes that she even fell at all.

The kind of silly thing is,the doctor wants it to be my Grandmother’s decision. There’s no way in hell she’s ever going to decide that.This is why a relative has power of attorney to make these decision for her because she can’t or won’t. We’ll see what happens.

8. My step-daughter will be arriving from Panama to come live with us in about 2 weeks, just in time for her 18th birthday

9. My step-son has been talking to Marine recruiters. I don’t know what to say about this. I can’t help but feel that he’ll be taken advantage of as an English-as-a-Second Language minority. I suspect he’s been promised all sorts of things from the military that will never be delivered. The bottom line is,there is nothing his father can say to convince him that it’s a mistake and therefore, we just have to let him do what he wants.

10.Books - I haven’t been reading much lately for some reason but I’m almost done with Beloved by Toni Morrison. I have no idea what I’m reading next.I usually end up reading whatever Dylan or the girls are reading for school, so my reading selection might be something like The Midwife’s Apprentice and Joseph Conrad’s Heart of Darkness at the same time. Talk about confusing….

We just got Stephen King’s new one in the mail,though…and since it’s sitting on my desk right in front of me, tempting me…I think that will be next on the reading list.

Yesterday, Chris brought to my attention the news story about the Christian group that plans to protest at Heath Ledger’s memorial service. It’s because he played a gay cowboy,you know…promoting sodomy and other things that good Christians never,ever do.

I echoed his sentiments that ,indeed - those people are really disturbing. Then this morning,I was recounting the story to hubby and for whatever reason felt compelled to go check out the website of the religious group that is planning said protest. On my monitor in huge blue letters, read” Thank God Heath Ledger is Dead!” and continued on to praise the fact that Heath is now in Hell for playing a fag.

I think I felt more disgusted having that appear on my computer than the most subversive deviant porn known to man. Water bondage combined with scat and beastiality is appealing compared to that nonsense.

Since this group says that God hates America…and they claim to love this God guy….then I can’t help but wonder why they want to stay in America? Maybe they should team up with that Christian group that wants to move to South Carolina and secede from the United States? I think instead of moving to South Carolina (which I would never condone because I know some people in South Carolina I like and would hate their state ruined), I suggest they just go buy an island and colonize it as their Godly Nation they so covet.

I know…this isn’t a terribly constructive or tolerant idea. Being a follower of pagan traditions, I’m sensitive to religious tolerance and recognize that particular group of people have the right to their beliefs but the manner they practice their beliefs does nothing to better society and that offends me a member of the human race.

I personally think it’s a great idea, religious intolerance aside (Not that it’s exactly being intolerant to be against these groups - it’s really just being conscientious of what’s happening in the arena of domestic terrorism.)
From an anthropological and societal standpoint,it’s a perfect opportunity to observe and study a theological society and a chance to see how a society different from ours operates.With the success of Meercat Manor on The Animal Planet, I’m sure The Discovery Channel could develop a hit reality series. They could call it Island of Intolerant Idiots God’s Great Garden. Or something equally catchy and dorky.

Something tells me that within 2 months, some woman is caught on camera Googling abortifacients and ordering pennyroyal by mail order and some men are busted sneaking away from prayer meeting for a special private moment alone. I’m just a realistic observer of human nature who doesn’t believe for a second that a conceptual deity can dictate human things that have happened since man and women walked the earth.

Religious banter aside, I sincerely hope this group doesn’t interrupt memorial service happenings too terribly much. I don’t care who died….people who are mourning have a right to mourn the person they loved without him or her being judged . It’s just common decency.It’s a shame some people in our society lack that.

When President Bush stands before a crowd of pro-life demonstrators and says,You’re here because you know that all life deserves to be protected… I’m proud to be standing with you,” .

All life deserves to be protected.
This from a man who began a war that has killed over 100,000 people. I do not draw distinctions between American lives and Iraqi lives in that tally because after all by Bush’s own statement, ALL life deserves to be protected.A life is a life.Period.

If you’re pro-life,then you help to make changes in the world so that more than half the world doesn’t go to bed hungry and die of starvation. Just because you’re own children’s bellies are full at night doesn’t mean everything is right in the world and you really should give a damn. No…strike that. You should give more than a damn.

If you take a stance for pro-life, then you also don’t make policies that destroy the environment. That “life” thing applies to animals and trees and the ecosystem,too ya know.

If you care about children enough to save their life, then you take a child who was born into this world who was tossed aside like last week’s leftovers,only not treated as delicately and raise it as your own.For whatever reason, a woman gave birth to a child she didn’t want. Maybe she was guilted by pro-life rhetoric. Maybe she just didn’t care from the very start. She gave birth to a child and didn’t feed it. She left it alone. She hit it when it cried. Sometimes she did worse. Someone cared enough to call attention to what she was doing and that kid was put in a foster home.And then another. and another. And abused,neglected some more. Made to feel alone,worthless ,unloved,unwanted. If you value all life,then you do something about the lives that made it into this world who weren’t wanted and loved and stop worrying about non-viable fetuses.

There are far too many children in this world NOW who need to be cared for. Let’s take care of the ones we got first before we start saving others that aren’t even here.

I’m sorry. I just really hate hypocrites.

Crazy stupid headlines in the news lately. They all kind of make me go “WTF?”.

The most exciting one for me yesterday was the official announcement that Peter Jackson will be producing The Hobbit

*squeals and does the Hobbit Happy Dance*

(you don’t even want to know what that dance looks like but I can tell you I’m just about short enough to pull it off with gusto)

All I have to say about that one little indiscretion that has made headlines and that everyone seems to be talking about is this: When I was 16 and knocked up ,it never made the headlines and I guarantee my pregnancy was far more shocking and unexpected to most people than one of the little Spears’ girls.

I just don’t see why this is news.750,000 teenage girls get pregnant every year and it’s not really daily news.More than half of them already lived in poverty when they became Mamas. The Spears are financially able to make sure their teenage daughter gets proper prenatal care and parenting classes and hire additional help to provide childcare so that their daughter can obtain a decent education so she can provide and care for her own child. Most girls her age in her situation cannot say the same and their daily lives providing for their children are full of uncertainties and instability without financial security and being assured of an education .

I’m just saying that I think there are a lot more girls out there worthy of focusing my attention on and unlike the popular consensus,I wouldn’t be focusing my attention on them to cast an appalled and disgusted judgment their way but instead to help encourage and support her so that she’s a parenting success instead of a trainwreck.